-- deep philosophical observations , open

[theodore ignatius alcott]

Theodore liked it here. It had a nice atmosphere. He’d gotten used to the old-fashioned ‘pub’ of the old in. It was rustic, yet warm and inviting. And no one cared if you sat in the corner, keeping to yourself and drinking a beer. His band had regular gigs there of a Saturday afternoon- yeah, not the greatest time slot, but it got their name out there, and it was regular money so who was he to complain? Alright, well maybe he was the most likely but in this particular situation he just wasn’t going to. I know, big shock.

The young man had gotten into something of a habit of hanging around after the gig and having a few beers. Perhaps it wasn’t the best way to spend a Saturday night, but he seemed to like it. After all, it wasn’t as though he was the sort to have a thousand parties to attend every weekend, nor was he struggling to keep up with the oh so many friends. No, a quiet night of drinking suited him just fine. Besides that, there was always the chance of a groupie or two being turned on by his mystery. As much as he hated to admit it, meaningless sex could actually be rather good.

Raising one hand in a silent goodbye, Theo watched as the other band members collected their things and made their way towards the exit. Occasionally one or two of his fellow musicians would join him in his after gig adventures, however tonight they were all heading out to a party. Which of course they had invited Theodore to, and he had regrettably declined. He really wasn’t in the mood for a large party full of obnoxious young people. His mood was far too melancholy for such tom-foolery. No, it was much better if he sat by himself with his liquor and made deep philosophical observations about what was happening around him. Besides, he’d heard the band with the gig spot after his wasn’t bad.

Slinging his guitar over his shoulder, the young man made his way to the bar. Ordering himself a whiskey on the rocks. He was in the mood for something a little more palatable then beer- which was what he normally ordered. Once he was presented with the drink, he nodded his thanks to the attractive bar-keep and made his way to his usual dark corner. He loved lurking in dark corners. Some would teasingly say it was his favourite pass time. Putting his guitar down first, the man slid into the booth. Taking a sip of his drink as he watched life carry on around him.

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[hadley grace middleton]

What was she doing here? Hadley Middleton wasn't the kind of girl to be caught dead in a pub like this (by means of her reputation, at any rate) and yet here she was, gliding through the doors and directly towards the bar, completely intent on getting the strongest drink she could order from somewhere with standards as low as it seemed to be sporting. Alcohol this early in the afternoon was another rule being broken. No respectable lady started hitting the booze before the sun was even down, but with the day she'd had it was either a glass of Long Island Iced Tea or climbing into bed and refusing to get out for days on end.

The thing about being an intern was that she managed to shoulder the blame for every little mistake made by any individual in the company and, in turn, it was Hadley who took the abuse from unhappy clients. A woman who's wedding dress was supposed to be complete openly threw a box of straight-pins directly at Hadley's feet whilst another ripped apart a decorative flower arrangement on the front counter. Yes, she'd wanted to be involved in fashion design her whole life, but Hadley had been starting to wonder if the hours of abuse were really worth it at the end of the day.

And thus, with a head full of clutter and a whole lot of steam to blow off she'd walked from her house to the closest pub (it saved driving drunk and also paying for a taxi - the pay package of an intern wasn't exactly flattering) and the only thing on her mind was just how much she needed a stiff drink and one of the cigarettes she usually kept stashed under her mattress only to be smoked in times of complete crisis. Now was certainly one of those times.

For a few moments Hadley considered taking a seat at the bar but then made the decision that it would probably look all too desperate. So, when her drink was poured and passed across the surface, she took it and turned to look for a quiet place in which she could sit and drown her sorrows. The only problem was that an individual she hadn't really wanted to see seemed to have the same idea. Theodore Alcott - her ex-flame, musician, and complete slut when it came to his groupies. Or at least that was what Hadley had pegged him as, at any rate.

She could be childish and avoid him - pretend she hadn't noticed his presence or even his existence - or she could say a quick hello, finish her drink and move along. She was more mature than hiding from her problems for the most part, and so she made her way over to the young man with all the confidence she could muster.

"Theodore," she murmured, nodding her head in greeting. In some strange sense she almost hoped he'd ask her to leave him alone.

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[theodore ignatius alcott]

My my my. Wasn’t this such a thrilling turn of events? Hadley Middleton was in his pub, ruining any chance he had of enjoying himself. Hadn’t they like, discussed certain parts of town that were off-limits? Or had that conversation only happened in his mind? Perhaps it had happened in his mind, since this wasn’t the first time in the years they have been broken up that he’d un-willingly run into her. It went without saying that the girl really wasn’t a favourite person of the young musician. For obvious and not so obvious reasons. Seeing her just did not agree with his psyche. It upset him in more ways he’d care to explain, or make known.

She had been the only one he’d considered letting in. Ever really. Day by day he let her a little further into his heart; into his soul. And what did the spoilt brat do? She didn’t accept the fact he was actually falling for her graciously, that was for sure. No, she accused him of slutting it up with his groupies. Also, she never had much time for his deep musings. He wasn’t sure which was worse, the fact that she didn’t trust him, or the fact that she didn’t accept him for who he was. They were both pretty horrid, really.

The young man had actually written many a song lyric depicting the pain she’d put him through. But then, that was nothing she needed to be made aware of- under and circumstances. In fact, no one was seeing those songs. Even if they happened to be some of the best he’d written. A man needed some private outlet for his secret thoughts, did he not? Alright, so maybe this particular boy had a little too much space for private feelings. He knew full well that he probably should be more open and forthcoming with that sort of thing, but since when did knowing something mean you actually had to do it?

Keeping his face as even as possible, the boy raised a small eyebrow as he watched the young woman make her way towards him. Really, did she have to come over and make in unpleasant for both of them? With a sigh, he inwardly cursed the social graces that dictated that she be polite and civil with him. Really, society let you down a rather lot didn’t it? Always dictating he do rather annoying and silly things. Why wasn’t it allowed that you just completely ignore anyone you used to engage in coitus with? The word would be a much easier place to live in, really.

Giving her a slight nod of a greeting, he took up his glass and had a sip. The more alcohol he had in his system, the easier this interaction would be. “I wasn’t aware girls like you came to places like this pet..” he spoke, in his deep gravelly voice. Looking her up and down. Even he had to admit, she was still attractive as hell. “Sit?” The offer slipped out of his mouth before he could really stop himself. Maybe it was because his eyes had just trailed up and down her slender thighs, or maybe he was just delirious. Whatever the reason though, he’d said it and he couldn’t take it back now. He wasn’t a complete jerk now was he?

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[hadley grace middleton]

The past was such a tricky thing - full of mistakes and regrets that, although left in yesterday, could still come back and haunt you at any given time. Without being able to tell the future it was impossible to know that something was being screwed up before it was already too late. And here was Hadley's past, sitting right in front of her, watching her with the same eyes he'd watched her with quite some time ago. It was like the fates laughing in her face, throwing the icing on top of her already horrible day.

At least, for a few moments, she'd had hope that he'd beg her to leave him alone. Was he not angry enough with her to ignore her and act like a sullen child? Perhaps their break-up hadn't really been messy enough to mean they'd feel compelled to to avoid one another's gaze at every given opportunity. To be fair, she had been the one to approach him - she hadn't, however, thought that he might ask her to sit and join him. That was actually the last thing on Hadley's mind and for a few moments she was entirely dumbfounded.

She was an adult, however. A gracious, strong, independant adult and she certainly didn't need to lower herself by refusing to sit with him for a few moments. She had wondered (when they had first broken up) if they could ever just be friends. The fact of the matter, however, was that there was simply too much chemistry between them. She was disgustingly attracted to him even now and it made her feel sick to her stomach. If she was brutally honest with herself Hadley would find she'd never truly get over Theodore. He'd always be there and he'd always taint many of her memories.

It was hard not to heave a sigh as she nodded her head, put her drink down and slipped the light coat from her otherwise bare shoulders. The warmer weather meant less clothing and it was something Hadley was almost regretting, careful not to expose too much of any part of skin as she slid into the booth across from Theodore. One drink and then she could leave, right? One drink was polite without either of them overstaying their welcome, without things getting too awkward.

Raising her glass with careful hands, Hadley sipped at the warming liquid. Well, at least if he got too 'fresh' she had an entire glass of an incredibly alcoholic substance she might be able to throw in his face. "So, how have you been?" Polite, gracious, chaste. All the things social graces taught her.

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[theodore ignatius alcott]

Yes, the past was a tricky thing. He’d have to agree with Hadley on that one. Your past feelings could creep on you in any moment, especially when the object of those feelings was now slipping out of her coat and into the seat across from you. The young man couldn’t help but let his eyes roam. With the removal of her coat exposed more skin and Theodore had to admit, he liked it. He was a man- a man who found Hadley so incredibly attractive. So of course, if he was going to show off skin around him, he was going to look. He wasn’t even ashamed of that fact. There was nothing wrong with enjoying the beauty of a female, as far as Theodore was deserved. In fact he was sure girls (or well, women) liked being admired. Why else would they get all dressed up?

She was asking questions. Those were not good. Theodore had never done well with words and she knew it. He understood though how his lack of words was awkward for other people so used to talking. He supposed he could forgive her- maybe. Swilling his own drink, the young man considered her question; or rather how to answer her. Going into detail was never the option, so now he had to decide exactly what to tell her. Perhaps the ever used ‘I’ve been fine’ platitude would be in order? But then, even to Theodore that seemed way too impressionable for someone who used to mean so much to him. Why was interacting with other humans so hard? Really, he didn’t understand it. It just didn’t need to be so complicated. Everyone made it just so complicated. It was pathetic really.

Just as he was readying himself to answer her question, the music coming from the band-stage caught his attention. He rather enjoyed this song. It was a cover of a classic rock song that, in fact, reminded him of Hadley. Smiling softly he put his drink down and stood up. Moving around to her chair, he extended his arm out to her. Palm up in welcoming. “Dance with me.” It wasn’t a question, nor a command. He’d always had a funny way of wording things. He was above asking questions, but too polite to just demand people do things. He had a soft, gravely way of saying things that he found usually worked. Without tooting his own horn- he had a voice that was hard to refuse.

So without waiting for any sort of a response, he enclosed her smaller hand with his and tugged on her fingers. Pulling her up and out of her chair. She really didn’t have any choice in the matter, but he was just so charming he was hoping she wouldn’t care. Leading her silently, he found an empty patch of space. There were a surprising number of people dancing. Which was nice, it meant they wouldn’t be watched too much. Turning to her, he kept one hand over hers, the other moving to touch her lip slightly as he drew her in a little. Creating the classic pose one would see with ballroom dancing.

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[hadley grace middleton]

It was just like Theodore to use his actions instead of his words, and it was something Hadley had never entirely understood. It made no sense for someone so poetic to be at a loss for what to say. Perhaps it had something to do with the fact that writing songs never really meant he had to express himself. Sure, they were always very full of meaning and written about some sort of loss or heartache, but nobody ever said that heartache had to be Theodore's own. A question directed at him and only him, however? He couldn't hide behind clever lines and lies when something like that happened. No, he knew he'd have to answer eventually and Hadley supposed it made him somewhat nervous. It had taken her a hell of a long time to get him to open up in the first place.

And in return she'd always been powerless in the face of him. He'd always had a way of manipulating her that nobody else had ever really managed to master. A carefully spoken line in that gravelly voice and Hadley was as useless as a mute - rendered speechless and completely without actions of her own. She never really had a choice when he asked her to dance, and it wasn't really a question because he knew very well she'd be unable to refuse. He was like someone well-practiced in an art, learned in the skills that he could carefully put into place. Before Hadley knew it her hand was enclosed in his and her heartbeat was amped up a few levels.

She was ashamed of herself, really. Hadn't she been the one to break up with Theodore in the first place? She'd been strong enough to refuse him then and yet now she was giving in again? It made no sense and it was somewhat infuriating, yet here she was, drawing herself closer in spite of her pride, nostrils being filled with the aromatic scent of him that hadn't changed at all. Her breath was warm and light against his neck and she stayed as close as the position they held would allow, at a loss for words herself and honestly enjoying the moment. It was horrible to remember him and be reminded of what she'd thrown away over foolish suspicions. Really, Hadley would look back on this moment later and thoroughly regret it, but for now she'd enjoy the moment.

"You always liked this song," she murmured against his skin. Nobody else was dancing - in fact, Hadley didn't really think that where they were could be classed as any sort of 'dance floor', but she didn't particularly care, either. She'd had a horrible day and Theodore's arms felt familiar around her, almost like a hug and a kiss from your mother when you fell over and scraped your knee. "Tell me how you've been, Theo." She spoke it again, because she genuinely was curious and it was too awkward to do this in total silence.

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[theodore ignatius alcott]

Hadley was wrong; his music was about him, his emotions. Even the songs that he didn’t keep secret that seemed to be about completely different subjects- they all had a small piece of him in them. Like an intricate puzzle that if you extracted all the pieces correctly and slotted them in together, you’d see the perfect picture of his soul. So actually, he was not about to set Hadley, or anyone straight on that little fact. He wasn’t exactly keen to give everyone the information they needed to see though him.

Theodore didn’t mind that she was getting close. In fact a small part of him hoped she would take his lead and lean into his neck. That way he could rest his cheek against her hair, and breathe in the scent of her shampoo. A scent that had long since lingered in his mind after they parted. He knew all the reasons why he shouldn’t; but Theo liked having her back in his arms once more. It felt, well, right. Despite everything that had happened between them, holding her against him still felt comfortable, natural- like that was how it was supposed to be. He knew she wouldn’t stay there, knew it wouldn’t end up that way. He was just going to enjoy the moment.

Smiling at her words, he felt his neck tingle slightly. He had a rather sensitive neck, and having her so close was enough to get him going- let alone her words against his flesh. He wasn’t complaining though, oh no. “It’s always reminded me of you..” He spoke softly, keeping his voice even. He wasn’t one to give away too much emotions. Perhaps he already had, by telling her thing song expressed his feelings for her? It meant that if she listened to it and worked out the way he interoperated it, she’d know how he felt. Or at least used to feel. He wasn’t sure what to feel about her now. That was normal though, after a break up, he was sure.

There she was again, asking questions. Theodore let out a low sigh. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to tell her how he had been. It was more that he wasn’t in the mood for idle chit-chat about things that really didn’t matter. Who cared how many gigs he’d had in the past few years, or that the manager of his band had a new cat, or that he had brought himself a new base. None of that really mattered at all. Living in the past was dull anyway. Couldn’t Hadley just enjoy this moment they were having together? Or was she going to insist on a run-down of everything he’d eaten in three years?

He knew he needed to say something, but he wasn’t going to answer her question. Instead, he moved his hand to her back, gripping her a little tighter while he dipped her. “I’ve missed the scent of your shampoo, you know.” It was actually strange she hadn’t changed it, or maybe she had and he was just imagining the familiar scent? Either way, he enjoyed it.

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